This week has been the toughest on me than any other this year. I've struggled, I was challenged, I was learning, I was repairing, I was hurting, I was a success!
The weight of college piled up on me like never before. I was taking school as serious as I've ever done in my whole life!.. so I'm not throwing this weight aside to anywhere. I've kept up
then fell,
then fell even more.
Last week I declared that I couldn't fall anymore.
It wasn't only the heaviness of school laid upon me but also personal struggles. Inside & out. Every time I sit down to take a rest, I know I really shouldn't because there is much more to be done but the tiredness in myself refused to even listen. Time didn't go easy on me either. Some other personal struggles simply pressed on as well. Is there a bright side to this story?... Try Nova!
I worked and worked, made mistakes & fixed them, constantly try to get back up before I slipped again. I summarized this Wednesday day as horrible, tough & just looked upon it negatively. While reflecting on my day...I heard something. It was more than a thought, but it was something I no where near had thought of!
It was so much along the lines of...
"YOU DID SUCCEED IN THE END."
It took a me a good second to figure out why the sudden positive short sentence? but I realized it was actually true. In my photography class that day I did leave ending up with the perfect picture. It was so hard because I've never worked with film, chemicals, pure darkness & prints.... ever! Not once! I was gonna call this quits. I was so caught up in my errors & imperfections that I forgot that I have succeeded. Strange isn't it?...
That was the middle
For the last days of this week
everything ended on a good note.Today I had presentation, & my topic captured most interest. Before I've asked God to step in, this was just a thing in history & just a presentation..which turned into an amazing discussion.
In art I drew in my sketch book, I expected major critics & for the professor to point out the many errors that I think I see!
Instead I got compliments?
I'm not trying to be modest but i was so shocked. He told me things like "Excellent, Great, You got it Exactly right!"
Never got that before!
I'm just so glad that I have a God who changes things. He will put the thing I want right into my hand, even when I don't deserve it. I felt like this has all started when I improved my prayer life. I see Him more...I see that He sees me.
I see that I can be a success.
Praying really does something. Just putting that quality & your own crying heart changes the direction in your life.
When you're suppose to be headed down God sees & can turn you facing up.
I know everyone has too much of a busy schedule to pray but it's not up to us to work God into our schedule but we gotta work our schedule around God!
My schedule was hectic this week,
every class assignment was unbearable,
every struggle tired its best to fight me
every fear tried to rise.
I've stepped in & out of prayer during it all & made it!
He answered me
told me that
I have succeeded.
